When we were growing up, it wasn’t smart to talk about feelings. Through movies, series, and pop culture in general, we’ve learned that boys shouldn’t cry.
Abu Bakr “Abu” Hussein says so.
He is, among other things, the presenter of the radio program “Med All Respekt”, and a familiar face on the program “Sofa”. In the latter, he comments on what is happening on TV with his best friend Mayoo Indiran.
In 2016, Abu went through a difficult period with heart failure and depression, and he was looking for someone who could help him start training.
The message to Mayoo Indiran, then known from the Paradise Hotel, was the turning point.
– In that letter, I saw someone asking for help to find the spark of life again and to live and survive. Then we started training together, found chemistry and became best friends, says Mayoo.
Performance and competitions
According to psychologist Tommy Monsen Sotkajervi, men often become friends based on common interests.
A meeting place for sports activities or other things.
Traditionally, men have often been more social through physical play, achievements, and competitions since they were boys. Sotkajervi adds that men and boys are often more physical than women in their interactions with others.
While women have been largely socialized through conversations since they were girls. Their relationship with friends is often characterized by a deeper relationship with more exchange of feelings, he says.
Few men ask for help
Furthermore, he points out that although times have changed, there are still differences in how men and women express feelings.
When men feel unwell, they are more likely to withdraw without having someone to talk to about their feelings, the psychiatrist explains.
This is why men – at the group level – can cope worse when they suffer psychologically. He adds that fewer men seek help from others than women, and this can have very negative consequences.
Be strong in the head
Abu and Mayu realize how difficult it is for boys to talk about how one is In fact own it.
When they were growing up, it was not socially acceptable for a boy to show feelings.
There was no room to talk about feelings, says Abu.
It had a huge impact on both, and especially on Mayoo:
– when you grow up in “ghetto” In Stovner you cannot cry or show feelings. You must show anger and aggression. He says being strong had a totally different meaning to me back then than it does now.
– Now it’s all about being strong, he says, to be able to handle the situation and deal with the challenges you’re facing.
– Universe Strong in the head, simply put, a bullet in the abo.
Progress in the past ten years
They both feel there is a lot more room for the boys to talk about feelings now than there was 10 years ago.
– It’s an important advance. Abu stresses that it is important to focus on men’s mental health.
They found in each other someone with whom they could share their deepest thoughts.
– Mayoo says, I didn’t let anyone else into my life other than Abu.
In their friendship, there is room for both nonsense and nonsense, as well as more serious topics.
– It’s nice to see that guys can also have this kind of friendship. To have a friend with whom you can talk openly and honestlyadd Mayoo.
Get to know Abu and May better at “best friends in the world” On NRK 1 on Saturday at 19.50.
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